Love conquers. Love challenges. Love encourages. Love changes things.
With love comes forgiveness. This is something that I struggle with personally.
I am a grudge holder. I have a hard time letting things go. I take things to heart.
Lately I've been learning an important lesson: that forgiveness is freedom. By forgiving someone you not only free them, but you free yourself. You are no longer letting negative feelings invade and fester in your heart.
Forgiving someone isn't saying that you agree with what they did or even that what they did was okay. Forgiving someone is releasing yourself from the burden that you're carrying around. Forgiveness is not a feeling, but a choice. Grudges hold you back, but forgiveness pushes you forward.
Photo credit: Meg Cady Photography
I challenge you to choose forgiveness. I'll take it a step further. I challenge you to choose forgiveness even if the person that you're forgiving isn't sorry.
Today, I'm choosing forgiveness. Today, I am free.
I saw this excerpt from Louis De Bernières' Captain Corelli's Mandolin and the beauty of it left me speechless.
"Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of eternal passion. That is just being 'in love' which any fool can do. Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident. Those that truly love, have roots that grow towards each other underground, and when all the pretty blossoms have fallen from their branches, they find that they are one tree and not two."
Amazingly written... those were words I needed to hear. Thanks girl!
ReplyDeleteI love that quote....sometimes when that can't eat can't sleep feeling goes away...I begin to think something is wrong....which is unrealistic.
ReplyDeleteBeautiful.
I love this! I'm on the same page as you with holding grudges. But I'm still learning to forgive. It's a long and hard process and I feel like you would always need time to totally forgive someone. :)
ReplyDeletexo,
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Well said my friend!!! Forgiveness is KEY to moving on.. for yourself more than anyone! And that's a lesson that keeps on building for me each and every day!! The only person that keeps us from moving on is ME, and I am so glad to have people like YOU to remind us of that.
ReplyDeleteLove to love you friend! Have a fantabulous day! xo, Bev
That excerpt is so powerful. That describes real love so well and is a testament to why some marriages succeed and some don't. "Love itself is what is left over when being IN love has burned away." Love is so much more than just the butterflies in the first few weeks, months, and even years.
ReplyDeleteI think the universe is trying to tell me something! Today I wrote a letter to my friend/Big sister [from my sorority] on why I haven't talked to her in months (she didn't talk to me or say 'I'm sorry' when both my grandmothers passed away earlier this year, exactly one month apart).
ReplyDeleteI told her in the message that I don't think I can forget what she did or forgive her but I could move on from it. Now I realize I shouldn't have said that because I will forgive her, in time. My grandmothers wouldn't have wanted me to hold a grudge with her.
<3
carelessly graceful
All of these words are so powerful.
ReplyDeleteBeautiful really. Life changing.
I am so encouraged that you are choosing forgiveness ad freedom. Sometimes it's hard ...well really always.
I love you! I also feel honored that you chose that picture. The day I took those was one of the days where freedom was felt exponentially!
Love you sweet friend!
such sweet truth! beautiful post. and that quote at the end...gave me goosebumps!
ReplyDeletewe're on the same page, girl. i posted about forgiveness last month. it's hard to do, but it is definitely freeing.
ReplyDeleteNot sure if you're a fan of Dixie Chicks, but the line "Forgive sounds good, forget, I'm not sure I could." Like you, I hold grudges too, but in a different way. I just put a HUGE guard up and only trust a little bit, if at all. It takes a long time for that wall to go down. I'm glad you shared this post!
ReplyDeleteI so needed this...I've definitely been struggling with forgiveness lately. And that excerpt is beautiful. Thank you!
ReplyDeleteForgiveness is a great thing. One of the most frustrating parts of it though is the other person who hasn't forgave and holds the grudge. I struggle even forgiving for that.
ReplyDeleteGreat post friend! I definitely hold a grudge too, I think sometimes it's tough to forgive when we have expectations of the people close to us. But I have found that learning to forgive definitely makes me a lot happier, it's not easy to forgive but it's worth it.
ReplyDeleteThat quote was one of two readings read at our wedding 3 weeks ago... A personal favourite ;)
ReplyDelete